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Tuesday, June 8, 2010

I-Phone, U-Phone, We All Moan the Cell Phone

I-Phone, U-Phone, We all Moan the Cell Phone!

by Jody Worsham, All rights reserved to purchase Text Abbreviations Book

In the seventies we complained of a communication gap, a failure to communicate. That cannot be the case today as we seem to be a generation of strangers in constant communication with each other.

Look at any shopping mall, concert, or just people walking down the street and chances are they are on a cell phone.

At recent writer’s conference human beings were texting each other from one table to the next. I watched as blueberries, blackberries, and the next generation I-phones were whipped out in response to every texted question.

“Where do you want to go eat?” from the I-phone.

Blackberry response “I just made a reservation at Rudy’s”.

“I see Carnival has enough cabins for all of us at a reduced rate if we book now,” from a Palm Pad.

“What’s the life span of a duckbill platypus?” queried from somebody’s hand.

“Wait and I’ll Google that” from another kind of berry.

Texting is equal to writing notes when I was in school, I guess. Shorthand in high school ruined what spelling skills I had. Texting would eliminate them all together. Texting will produce a whole generation of non-spellers but will also produce a whole new written language of hieroglyphics ...LoL, OMG, lof, Those of us taught to write in complete sentences will never be able to afford to text unless we have unlimited minutes for texting.

None of the new phones are Boomer Baby friendly except for Jitterbug. Jitterbug is capitalizing on the boomer babies with their big numbered cell phones with the extra loud speakers and a real human support person who can dial that number for you or add it to your address book. They just need to go one step further and make the phone voice activated.

Phone-on-a-string would also be a nice touch. You could wear it around your neck so you wouldn’t constantly be searching in your purse or trying to ascertain if that twitching on your backside was your phone or a muscle spasm.

Until the new technology accommodates the older generation, we will have to rely on land lines…or having an eight-year-old handy to unlock our phones, download our numbers, and interpret our text messages. Fortunately, I have one at my house! I am sure we can negotiate a rent/lease agreement if you need an eight-year-old on a part time basis. Until then, we will just have to moan the i-phones!


Sharon said...

Go Jody!! Funny and oh so true.

Hey I got a cheap phone ($20) at Verizon about a year ago. It just makes and receives calls and texts and takes teeny, tiny photos. I need to get a magnifier just to see what the babies look like when their mom sends pictures.

If you want one of these gems you need to search for it back in the corner behind all the hi-tech models. And - the sales person will get pi$$y because he/she can't live on that small commission.

Wanda said...

Guilty by berry - that's me.
Loved it Jody.

Unknown said...

LOL! (ah oh, I'm doing it too!)

I understand, sugar. I started wearing those t-shirts with a front pocket, so I always had someplace to keep my cell phone. Problem arises when I forget to take the phone out of the pocket at night when I change clothes though, and the phone goes a-flyin' as I yank the shirt over my head though!

Great piece - you are a wonderful writer!