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Saturday, August 6, 2016

They Say They Come in Threes, Part III

By Jody Worsham
All rights reserved for appliance graveyard

I feel this has been the summer for electrical deaths.  I don't mean the "struck by lightning" kind but those caused by...well...old circuits.  First it was the washing machine and we all know how that went.  I'm still hauling water from the sink to the washer just so there will be enough water to slosh around.

Then there was the dishwasher, which was installed two days ago by the way.  I'm still trying to figure it out.  It is super quiet so you never hear it running.  After four weeks of having the kids wash dishes, some of the forks have food permanently welded between the tines.  The machine can clean it. But there is a problem.  It seems Mr. Kilowatt has successfully lobbied for a minimum two hour wash cycle.  To get the forks clean, I would have to use the sani-wash cycle which is nine hours.  I could buy new forks for what it would take to pay for the electricity.  After watching the blurr of the electric meter spinning out of control, Dr. Hubby suggested we go back to paper plates and cups.  The little Maytag man was right. Our dishwasher is quiet...and sneaky...and expensive.

And bad news comes in threes.  I think I told you our dyer was showing signs of depression what with the old washer and dishwasher gone.  I am happy to say the dryer is still tumbling along.  I think
it may be in cahoots with the dishwasher though because it is taking three times as long to dry a load of clothes.

The third in our trilogy of electronic failures is my computer. Maybe it was time. When I bought my computer, Windows 7 was brand new. And once I learned Windows 7 ( which took like a year). I saw no reason to upgrade. The Geek from the Geek Squad was amazed I had had it this long. He offered to transfer all my data...for a fee of course.

"Why?" I asked.

 "Don't you want all your data on your new computer?  Pictures? Bank records? Bill

"No, don't have any of that on my computer."

"So what do you use your computer for?" he asked. "Write blog stories but I have written copies of those...on a manilla a drawer...inside a metal file cabinet. And I look up math vocabulary so I can figure out what the eleven-year old is trying to do in 5th grade math...but his teacher asked me not to help him anymore."

 "So basically you just want a word processor that connects to the Internet."

 "Yes, unless you have a typewriter in the back room."

"What's a typewriter?"

A salesman, who obviously has a grandmother he adores, came to the aid of my sweating shaking Geek and said "I'll take it from here."  He led me down an aisle of shiny new computers.

"I like this blue one.  Blue is my favorite color," I said encouragingly.

"This black one is s better fit for you plus it will coordinate with your washer and match your dishwasher."

Ah  ha!  He must have read my blog.  A fan!


Next time , making the hyper jump from Windows 7 to Windows 8