To Clean or Not to Clean..Is that really a question?

By Jody Worsham
All rights reserved for a clean sweep 

Why is it that when I schedule the bug man to come and spray our house, I feel the need to go on a massive cleaning spree?  Before I commit to cleaning, increasing the hole in the ozone layer, and ruining my afternoon nap, I should answer the following questions.

1.  How long has the vacuum cleaner been sitting in the living room?  And is that tinsel on the handle? Christmas is just around the corner.
2.  Have the spiders completed mapping the entire universe with their cobwebs?  I'd hate for them to have to start all over.
3. Is the the dust levi about to break around the TV set?
4.  Are the grout lines in the tile even with the tile?
5.  Is the north wall fully insulted with stacked newspapers?  Could be a cold winter coming up.
6.  Are the clothes hanging on the treadmill now 3 sizes too small?  If they stay there, could be good motivation.
7.  Will the bug spray form a protective barrier or create a mudslide?  At least there would not be any more dust.

And most importantly


8.  Do any of the people on his client list know me and will he talk?

If the answer to #8 is yes, I'm donning my haz-mat  suit and going in for the clean-up.  Dirt doesn't stand a chance when it comes to a blabber mouth bug man.