Miss America, 82 years later

by Jody Worsham grinsandgroans at yahoo.com
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Is has been more than a few years since I watched the Miss America Pageant.  Things have changed.

Before watching the Miss America Pageant last night, I checked to see what interesting talents  I might see besides the customary singing,piano playing, and tap dancing.  Of the 53 contestants, the unusual talent fare included two baton twirlers, two Irish Step dancers, two violin performers, one ballet en pointe, two Bollywood dancers, one African Folkloric dance, and one combo baton, hoop, and flag twirling.  I was really hoping to see that last one.

After watching the talent performances that made it to the finals, I think the talent rules for the Miss America Pageant should be changed.  The young lady representing her state should have a talent representative of that state.  That would give us a good variety of talent to watch in between the TV commercials and the producers’ futile attempts to generate interest and suspense.

For example, Missouri is the "Show Me State" so maybe Miss Missouri could show us something.  I am not suggesting a tasteful striptease act, the swimsuit competition came pretty close to that this year or maybe I'm just getting old. Maybe she could show us how to carve a raft out of some logs. Miss Florida might wrestle an alligator.  Miss Louisiana could call ducks and Miss Alaska spearing a salmon would hold my interest.  I bet Miss Kentucky could race a thoroughbred around that giant indoor arena. Miss Texas could do some rope tricks or a Dallas Cowboy cheer and Miss New York could recite the Dow Jones closing numbers.

If you are going to represent you state, then that is what you should do.  Besides, if Miss New York had done that, then Miss Texas would have won for sure.  Not that I am disappointed that Miss Texas didn’t win, although she should have, but then I am a Texan.

I have to remember the Miss America Pageant is a scholarship pageant.  All that parading around in bikinis while wearing high heels, swooping down the runway in mermaid gowns, and twirling, dancing, singing and fiddling is to demonstrate how smart they are and how deserving of a scholarship they are.

In the years since I last watched the Miss America Pageant, I think I have missed something and it wasn't just the Miss Congeniality Award. 

Miss America has come of age.  Congratulations Miss America, aka. Miss New York, Bollywood and all.