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Tuesday, May 28, 2013

My Mama Didn't Raise No Fool

As told to Jody Worsham by Cousin Betty Sue

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Cousin Betty Sue ( that's Aunt Earletta's great niece by her first marriage) sent me this letter last week.
"Dear Cousin, 
I received an e-mail the other day announcing that my e-mail ID had won the Microsoft Lottery.  All I had to do was supply them with all my personal information and a small processing fee and my check for $1,000,000 would be in the mail.  I was not about to fall for that scam so I wrote them a firm letter.  Here’s what I said.

Dear Abbabaabb Ramikin, President of the Mercantile Bank and Mis-Trust of  Umbasi,

Thank you for letting me know I won the Micresoft Lottery but I think I should tell you that you misspelled Microsoft.  It is MicrOsoft , not MicrEsoft.  I don’t think the Macintosh boys would appreciate that. 

Now just let me tell you up front that my Mama, Cora Lee Robertson Smith, didn’t raise no fool in Pudluck, Arkansas when I was born there on January 30, 1979 at the Saints Preserve Us Methodist Hospital.  She warned me about scams like this.  That is why when I e-mailed you my social security number, I changed the last number. 

As far as the $150 you need to ship my money, I’m not giving you my credit card number either because I don’t have one even though every credit card in America has approved me for one.  Anybody at the Farmers Bank or Bust will tell you that I always pay by check or cash.  My checks are numbered and they know that the last one I wrote was number 2053.  They put a security number at the bottom… nobody would know which bank I use.  You will either accept my cash or nothing at all.

And I’m not falling for that old “check’s in the mail” ploy either.  You can just deliver my money right to my door at 1838 Knutt Avenue, Pudluck, Arkansas 000859 if you are really for real.  
Call me at 009-343-2211 and let me know it is on the way. If I am not home, I am probably at the blood bank donating my AB negative type blood like I do every six months, but my husband Robert Earl or any of our three children, Flora, Dora, or Cora can sign for it.

Until I hear from you, you are not getting any of my personal ID information.

Betty Sue Smith Mobley

Now you be careful if you get any e-mails from some e-male telling you you done won a lottery.

I guess I showed that scam artist that Mama didn’t raise no fool.  And what Mama didn’t do, Daddy did! 

Cousin Betty Sue"


Sharon said...

Hooray for Cousin Betty Sue. Your "letter" is so clever and funny.

Jody Worsham said...

Thanks, Sharon. I wonder how much information we accidently let slip when deailing with scams.

Starting Over, Accepting Changes - Maybe said...

As so easy as it is to spot most scams, I am always amazed when I read about someone falling for one. However, the government has been doing it to us for years but they call it being patriotic.

Susan Flett Swiderski said...

Love it! Unfortunately, there are way too many people around who divulge info about themselves in dribs and drabs all over the place, and it wouldn't be all that difficult for a scam artist to put them all together into one handy-dandy ID theft package.

Nice to meetcha. Thanks for stopping by my blog and leaving a comment. I do appreciate it. I'm pretty sure I've visited your blog before, but I don't see my mug shot among your other followers, so I'll just have to rectify that right now. (Or "rat now" as they say around these parts.) Count me in as your newest groupie.

Pixel Peeper said...

Hahaha...if something is misspelled in the subject line already, it goes right in my spam folder. Even if (or especially if) it looks like the email came from someone with my own name.

Thanks for stopping by my blog. I've bookmarked yours and will be back.

Stewart M said...

Thats funny - but there met be some people who fall for this kind of thing!

Cheers - Stewart M - Melbourne