Link Me Up, Scotty!

By Jody Worsham

All rights reserved for search of missing link.

I have been "invited" to link up with several people over the past few weeks. Now this isn't a dating thing, although for some reason my spam file is full of Cougar Find Your Cub mail lately. Linky dink seems to be some kind of business network thing. Since I am retired and heretofore unpublished, I don't know what business I have linking to whatever it is I linked…to. I know it has something to do with making connections but to what and what for, I haven't a clue.

It's like my friends that say they have a thousand "friends" on Facebook. How do they ever filter through a thousand e-mails each day? I don't think I know a thousand people and if I did, I'm sure I couldn't call them by name. Heck, I had to number my kids after a while because I couldn't remember their names. "Hey, Bobby, Billy, Brandon, Baxter, Bolivar, Number Six whatever your name is, stop swinging from the door facing and turn Number Four loose before you drop her."

Maybe they are looking for Baby Boomers to field test cell phones with supersized numbers and letters and speakers that plug into your hearing aids to give the Jitterbugs a run for their money. Or maybe they are testing those walk-in bath tubs with loud speakers attached that automatically say "Don't forget to close and lock the bathtub door" after you get in; course that might link you to the nearest plumber. Now that is something that I wouldn't mind being linked to given the age of my pipes.

I hope it is not like one of those electronic chain letter link things. I have been waiting six months and so far no new romance has come into my life (well except for those M&M dark chocolate pretzels). I haven't received any new recipes, the Publisher's Clearing House people haven't stop by with a bunch of balloons and an oversized check, and I'm way overdue for some good news.

In the meantime, "Link me up, Scotty!" This could be interesting!