Duck (make that) Bird Tape

by JodyWorsham
All rights reserved for taping ducks

I admit to using duck tape for a variety of reasons:  splicing 2x4's together, repairing a hem in a costume, making a dress form by wrapping a model wearing a t-shirt with multiple layers of duck tape, waterproof bandages for a horse's hoof, the normal every day things people do with it.  I have not yet resorted to trapping wildlife or making a tape ladder; although that does sound intriguing.

No, I will leave the more creative aspects of duck tape  usage to Dr. Hubby.  A long time advocate of such home remedies as WD-40 for wounded chickens, Vick's Vapo Rub for what ails you, and Old Spice Shaving Lotion for making  orphan calves acceptable to our Jersey cow, he has now added Duck Tape to his arsenal of home repair tools.

Recently our eight-year-old was testing the structural integrity of a bird's nest in the event of an earthquake registering 9 on the Richter Scale, by jumping up and down on the tree limb holding the bird nest.  He reported, after being caught, that th should not be insured by the good hands people.  Dr. Hubby examined the proverbial bird nest on the ground and saw that the eggs in the nest were unharmed thanks to the copious amounts of dog fur collected by the bird parents from our shedding Labrador.  I'm not sure the lab meant to shed so much fur, but the birds were fast.

Dr. Hubby picked up the nest and put it back in the tree.  Concerned that the structure might have been compromised by the budding seismologist and the 14 foot fall to the ground, Dr. Hubby brought out the duck tape and secured the nest to the branch.

The bird parents returned to check out their hew industrial high rise.  They liked the new industrial look.  Having your TV on HGTV facing the patio door and their tree, I
m sure, helped them acclimate to their new living quarters.

A few weeks later, the eggs had hatched and all had flown the nest.  Because duck tape is so strong, the nest will remain for the next tenants for years to come.

Duck Tape Condos may become all the rage.  The eight-year-old is already considering an online business for do it yourself bird nest builders. The kit would include a roll of  duck tape, which he is renaming bird tape, some twigs, and fur from a yellow lab named Sandy;  that is if Sandy isn't bald by then.

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