Noah and the RV

By Jody Worsham

All rights reserved to fund Fire the Weather Widget!

Since the kids were out of school today, we took advantage of the long weekend and went to Shreveport with our RV right after the kindergarten Olympic basketball game on Saturday. According to the Weather Widget, it was to be warm and sunny for the weekend. IT RAINED NON-STOP FOR 2 DAYS. I don't think the kids have ever watched so much TV or played so many video games.

At one point they asked if they couldn't please do something else. I gave them some tin foil I had removed from the windows so I could see how close the rising water was to our RV. They began making boats out of tin foil followed by 30 minutes of rule interpretation before the Tin Foil Regatta began. I was enjoying all this until I heard the five-year-old ask where the motor would go. Water? Electricity? Motor? Fortunately the nine-year-old said motors weren't allowed.

They put water in the bath tub and had a competition to see whose boat could hold the most coins before sinking. I was promised by the nine-year-old that she would return my $2 in change, which never happened. She claimed coin sinking victory but I think she cheated. She gave him quarters and she took the dimes. After two coins, his boat sank but hers was still afloat after four dimes.

I would like to think that they were learning something about water displacement and weight with this experiment but I think the nine-year-old just learned how to bilk me out of my change, cheat the five-year- old, and claim Tin Foil Regatta Championship for herself.

With these skills, I fear she may be headed for a career in politics.

Things to Do on a Rainy Cruise

Things to Do on a Rainy Cruise

By Jody Worsham All rights reserved to purchase water repellant

During six of the seven days of our cruise, our captain was able to spot, chase, and go through ever rain storm in the Caribbean. I think that may be some kind of record.

The sun worshippers were threatening mutiny. Parents of children were threatening mutiny. The only ones not threatening mutiny were the bartenders as their sales tend to quadruple in rainy weather.

Our cruise director, Jeff, in an attempt to quell the rebellion offered some additional rainy day activities for the guests. However, being the mother of eight children, I have extended his list.

Here is my list for a rainy cruise.

1. Count raindrops hitting the window port hole.

2. Eat

3. Watch the Raindrop Regatta. Which rain drop will be the fastest descending the port hole?

4. Eat

5. Watch the Flip Flop Hydroplane Races as people hurry across the wet deck.

6. Eat

7. Watch rain clouds build up and take bets on how soon the captain will overtake them.

8. Eat

9. Sit in your cabin and watch the closed circuit mini-cam broadcast live as people run, slip, fall, and hydroplane across the deck. Turn off the sound and make up your own dialogue for what the people are saying.

10. Eat

11. Float paper boats across the flooded deck.

12. Eat

13. Play miniature Float Golf. No clubs. Set the ball on the course. If it floats over the cup in less than one minute, you have a Drown-in-One.

14. Eat

15. Watch “Singing in the Rain” in the rain at the outdoor theatre.

16. And if all else fails to entertain you, EAT!

Now I know why all the pictures of Noah’s family after their forty-day and forty-night cruise are depicted as rotund.