No Aphabet was used in the Spelling of These Names

By Jody Worsham All rights reserved to purchase Spell Check.

One of the advantages of cruising is that you get to hear so many different accents and meet people from many different countries. Usually these are the people working on the ship. It’s like a mini U.N. or some international Survivor TV Show. You really get to know your waiters and your cabin steward as you see them several times a day.

As we sat down for our first formal dinner, our waiter introduced himself. I couldn’t repeat his name. First, because I have Texas ears and he was speaking without a Texas accent. Second, there were no vowels in his name. His name tag read UIIAUE; all vowels, no consonants. I asked what country he was from and he pointed to his name tag. I couldn’t pronounce it either, all consonants, no vowels. I guess all the vowels had been used up in spelling their names.

Our cabin steward came from a country that didn’t use vowels or consonants or even letters for that matter, just squiggles and wiggly lines. I was thinking what a difficult job it must be for the person who does the ships’ payroll.

Then I glanced at my dyslexic eight-year-olds’ journal, all consonants and only a few vowels. With her accent and unique way of spelling, she could work on a cruise ship. I wonder if I could get any good discounts if she did?